A famous quote states “if you believe in yourself, the world will believe in you because
perception is reality”
Self confidence is one of the most important traits a person can possess. For anyone
who aspires to lead a great and successful life, it is a neccessity. If you do not believe
that it's possible to achieve a set goal, you would not even attempt it right?
Now what is this confidence? Confidence is basically a state of mind in which an
individual trusts their abilities, judgements, and decisions, and feels empowered to take
risks, embrace challenges, and express themselves assertively, while being open to
learning, growth, and self-improvement. It’s a feeling of security about yourself or your
abilities as well as an acceptance of negative feelings such as fear, anxiety or insecurity
towards certain situations or people. It can be developed by doing activities that make
you feel good about yourself like exercising, reading books with positive messages etc.
You should develop a positive attitude towards life.
People sometimes confuse confidence with arrogance. The arrogant person is usually and
actually an insecure person, and their arrogance is a way to hide their insecurities.
The two primary contributors to self confidence are self efficacy and self esteeem.
Self efficacy is the belief in your ability to produce an achievement. while
Self esteem is your overall evaluation of yourself. Self esteem is the way you feel
about yourself. It’s how you see yourself and what you think of your abilities, skills, and
talents. Self esteem can be developed through positive experiences in life, such as
being praised by others or receiving compliments from family members. It can also be
developed through good habits like exercising regularly or eating healthy foods.
Low self-esteem is a feeling of worthlessness and lack of confidence. It may be caused
by past experiences; such as being bullied or rejected by others. Low self-esteem can
also stem from problems in the present: you may have low self-esteem because you’re
struggling to cope with an illness, for example, or because you’ve recently been through
a divorce.
CHARACTERISTICS OF CONFIDENT PEOPLE
As a confident person, you tend to;
1. Do what you believe to be right, regardless of criticisms
2. Admit mistakes and learn from them
3. Willing to take risks
4. Extol your virtues often
5. Accept compliments graciously
6. Intrinsically motivated, not seeking validation from others
7. Positive outlook on life
8. Active listener
However, it is common to find people doubting their abilities from time to time. Some
feel intimidated by others, while some just lack belief in themselves. If you find yourself
in one of these situations, there are ways to consciously combat self doubt, work
towards believing in yourself and ultimately develop self confidence. It is a skill, and just
like other skills it requires practice.
PRACTISING SELF CONFIDENCE
Below are the guidelines for practising self confidence more often;
Dress up
The first tip you can always turn to is proper dressing where you should pay attention to
your outfit so you can carry yourself confidently. It will also be easier when interacting
with others since you will not have to worry about your looks or how you smell.
Step up the pace
The next tip is stepping up the pace. In this case, one should watch how confident walk
and what the walking style might communicate. One of the questions to ask is, ‘Do they
walk slowly or quickly while their heads are up or down? or ‘Do they have a smile on
their faces? These pointers will help improve one’s confidence and flow your energy the
rest of your day. So, how you walk should be confident enough so that other people can
respect you.
Watch your posture
Posture is another tip that gives someone self-confidence. Ideally, how you carry your
body suggests more about how you feel about yourself. If you sprawl your shoulders
and become fidgety, then that is a sign that you are not confident with yourself. So,
standing or sitting upright while having your head up all the time and your shoulders
back would be ideal. It would help if you also kept an unwavering eye contact with the
other party in a friendly manner, as this helps you to be more confident and
commanding in what you do.
Personal advertisement
The next tip is personal advertisement, and this will guide you to carry yourself after
suffering a bad day. To explain this, you might be dejected after making a slipup on a
huge presentation where your employer is not pleased with what you did in front of your
audience. In this case, you might distance yourself from others. So, to boost yourself
out of this mess, you can address yourself in a mirror assuredly while facing the mirror
or even have a small silent meeting at your desk. This will remind you that you are still
versatile and proud despite the mistake. Through personal advertisement, you will get
back to your winning ways and get an instant energy boost.
Practice gratitude
Gratitude is another instrumental step. Usually, whenever we focus on what we do not
have, we will feel dejected. Instead, we should emphasize our energies on what will
make us proud of what we have. Making a comparison and having that feeling that you
have achieved more as compared to others is an excellent way of practicing gratitude.
Instead, one should note down the items which they should count as their blessings and
be thankful for in life and set goals to achieve what they do not have. Building your
relationship with the people you love, enhancing professional achievements, attaining
career goals, or even having better health will have to be listed and prioritized.
Pay people compliments
Paying people compliments is another pertinent tip. Usually, we might be tempted to talk
about others negatively. This happens mostly when we feel jealous. We might be
tempted to use offensive words which can hurt others. It is recommended that we
should always pick the positives and focus our energies on them. In line with this, giving
positive compliments and engaging in constructive talk is good. This will help you be
focused and optimistic. It will also boost your self-confidence.
Speak up
It would help if you also spoke up. Usually, people may be worried when they speak up
in meetings or even during group discussions. They might fear being judged concerning
their look or even their speech. This feeling comes from our minds because we always
feel awkward while addressing something in front of others. To improve on public
speaking skills, one should make it a game. Anytime there is a meeting, at least give a
small speech that will help you gain public confidence, enabling you to share your
opinions and ideas. Leadership skills will be seen the more you participate in sharing
thoughts, particularly in such meetings or discussion groups.
Exercise
Exercise is another way that helps someone get self-confidence. Having a nature walk
or even gym time refreshes a lot. These will help you feel better and more confident in
pursuing your goals. Some of the exercises that one can do include hiking, bike riding
and going to the gym, as they will help boost physical fitness.
Pursue your passions
Another tip would entail pursuing your passions. Ideally, following what you are
passionate about every day when you are free is very important. It might be reading
your favorite novel, researching your holiday travels, watching your favorite film, or even
doing garden work like planting flowers or vegetables (Upadhyay et al., 2020). You can
also spend that leisure time looking for artistic creations that will make you happier. It
can be from your gallery.
The more you do something new in your career; you will learn many other ideas that
would be helpful to you in what you are doing.
Stop the negative talk
Stopping negative talk is a crucial step in boosting self-confidence. Even though talking
ill about others is a common practice among humans, it is usually vital for us to cease
from this.
When we can control that urge of negative talk, we will be productive and only focus on
positive critique, which can improve other people’s lives rather than destroying them.
Thus, we should always concentrate on what can make our situation even better.
Besides, we should always be positive instead of focusing our energies on what will
destroy us instead. In an event when we focus on trivial negativities, our self-esteem
would take a beating.
A famous quote from Walt Disney;
“Somehow, I can't believe that there are heights that can't be scaled by a person who
knows the secret of making dreams come true. This special secret is summarized in the
four Cs; curiousity, confidence, courage and consistency, the greatest of which is
confidence. When you believe in a thing, believe in it all the way, implicitly and without question”.